I have so much pain and hurt in my heart. Please give me some advice Im so lost right now. "Everything about a later termination is already so incredibly difficult even just picking up the phone to make the appointment. He reminds me every day and he is resentful towards me like Im some kind of murderer. Davis, a mother of three, is fundraising online to cover the cost of traveling out of state to get an abortion. But I dont regret it either. Abortion pills are the most common way to end a pregnancy in the United States and have become a focus for anti-abortion groups and Republican officials seeking to block access in their states. That, and I literally broke up with him two days prior. Thanks for this wonderful piece. Even if you have others support around you, it can so easily feel like youre going through it alone. We had to double down on our declaration our family was complete. I have to go through a second one and I dont know what to do. My husband and i split up a few months ago but have been seeing eachother on and off during that time. What if I was never able to get back on track with school and start my career? We have been having the same unprotected sex as we were while still together. Gone are the days when the wind would touch my face, gone are the days when youre the wind. I feel for you. I dont want to lose you. He is also younger than me and nowhere near ready for a child and even moving in with me makes him scared. You have a child. You were my everything. Then I sobbed all night and I dont even know where it was coming from and I dont know if they will ever stop. My boyfriend stayed with me but after a while he started blaming me and our relationship change . It helps to know I am not alone so thank you. no one is on my side. I look back at him as the door closes behind me and I feel alone, until I remember youre there with me. My blood is one part plasma and two parts pinot noir. And then we came back home. I miss my baby. Rapid thoughts flooded my brain. Don't listen to the voices saying it'll be easier when I'm gone. This post hit home for me. I hope to someday get to tell my child face to face that I love them and Im sorry and they deserved better. I swallow hard several times until the pill burrows into the back of my throat like a rock. Best of luck! She is with you in your dreams at least. I will be 37 years old and have had previous abortions but after this miscarriage (I never had one before), fear that I will never conceive again came across me. I prayed for him but I let fear control my decision. This story is so touching and Im thankful to have come across it. And I don't need a room filled with toys. I take his hand in mine and say, Everything thats happened the past few weeks doesnt matter anymore. In South Africa, 85 000 abortions were induced in the year 2010 according to abort97.co.za. We then move to a different room and wait for the doctor. I feel so empty and outright irresponsible. I thought I was the problem. My boyfriend told me to abort mine and I dumped him and made that decision on my own. This is my first time reading a story that actually resonates with the bittersweetness if my own experience. It was beautiful. I wanted to be your everything. We talked all weekend, tried finding ways to make it work but we both knew it wasnt the time because of so many factors, the big ones being my health and finances. I aborted my second child at 10 weeks 16 years ago and have regretted it since. I'll do my very best to be good. Mamma you knew when I was placed in your womb. But I cant help but feel a deep sense of loss and regret over ending the pregnancy. It is sad to see children God has made being murdered. I wish I could turn back the hands of time. I want to help the conversation start on a different platform and educate. The film is based on a story called "A Letter from an Aborted Child," which had been used for nearly 10 years by Father Stephen Lesniewski to show women in a time of indecision. Up to this moment Im still thinking of her, asking God and her for forgiveness. I have been looking for support from this side. Its something I think about every day. I'll make you breakfast on Mother's Day The dad is eh. Luckily I was able to talk to my partner who was incredibly supportive but there were so many reasons for this not being the right time for us. Im a mother to 5 boys.. 2 from my previous marriage that I share 50/50 custody of and 3 littles that are with me 24/7. The Dublin Declaration , signed by over 1,000 medical professionals, states "As experienced practitioners and researchers in obstetrics and gynecology, we affirm that direct abortion - the. God is never bored of you. And wham, I unexpectedly end up pregnant, at 41. I am sad you were sad. I even Bought girl stuff.. in the end I told myself he was right. It haunts me every day . I had my first and only abortion 10 years ago at age 22, my partner who turned into my husband were together for only 2 months and the uncertainty left me with the choice to dissolve my pregnancy at 5 weeks. I am now 48 and very much regret it and really dont know how to go on, but somehow we must. And even though he ejaculated irresponsibly, and voiced that he wanted me to become pregnant.. as soon as I was, we both knew what needed to happen and he was on board. I dont blame you for choosing to terminate your pregnancy. As you can imagine, childhood and progression through young adulthood is very hard for foster children because most of our supports disappear once we turn 18 or so and are no longer eligible for the child welfare systems services. I was in a a similar position. Xx, I found out I was pregnant on this day a year ago and like you I was scared. You are making a decision that will affect not only your life but your boyfriend and your child if you choose to continue. Remorse Is Forever By I am a mom. You deserve the acceptance and tolerance of a choice that is yours and yours only. I didnt want to do this. I was so excited when I found out because I didnt even know if could have kids. We argued and I prayed on it. A group of doctors and conservative medical groups is suing to overturn the FDA's approval of mifepristone and a federal judge could rule to cut off . Your dad talks about how hes an alcoholic, out-of-work barista. Thank you for this. I have an ultrasound which tells me you are a five-week-and-two-day-old single embryo. I was one l with you. He doesnt want to start over and says that we are too old. Must be awful. is! I decide abortion at week 6. I cry. **** Truth is ive been crying my eyes out i am on birth control always on time with my pills. Emotionally I suffered very badly for the first 2 weeks after the abortion (even to the point of being suicidal at times which is massively out of character for me) I was warned that pregnacy hormones around this time are at their strongest and to expect extreme moods. A letter from an unborn baby: fHi mom!, how are you?, I am doing just fine thanks. She returns and hands me an envelope. When I started getting very nauseous all the time my Mom said I was definitely pregnant and we went to the gynecologist who gave me an ultrasound and said I was pregnant. He is the reason why I feel so motivated now, and although its not easy I wouldnt trade him for anything in the world. I commend you for making that choice. He made it clear that he did not want to have another child and truly no matter how bad I felt I wanted my baby, I did not want to do it by myself. Thank you so much for writing posting this just hope and pray that one day I will get a chance to be a mom again. i struggle deeply with wanting to try again. My husband is dead set against it and Im not sure what to do. . Eventually with some deep talks from my family I booked an appointment and decided it was best not to have the baby I had to have a surgical abortion at 16 weeks . Always imagine what he or she will look like. I dont want to regret terminating my baby but what if I get into a situation where I cant get out of? If you cant, then dont be guilty. I can hardly keep up with what I have now in my life. How do you know? I pull out the test and show him the two pink lines. Colorado. All other content on this website is Copyright 2006-2023 FFP Inc. All rights reserved. And an angel to look after you, too. The doctor leaves and your dad and I hold each other and cry. I feel she was a girl. Physically or health wise and its not suppose to be this way. Mark Ruffalo spoke out on reproductive rights this weekend, penning a letter in support of a woman's right to choose. Top Poems Weve been married about 10 years and I have children from my previous marriage that she loves as well but cant help being jealous of. i feel deep in my heart that i made the wrong decision and if i tried again i know i would make it right. An Honest Letter About Abortion. Now that he had finally accepted it, it officially became reality. I go into a patient room for questions and Im told your dad can join me later for the mini-counseling session. I always wanted to be a mum I adore children but back then I couldnt keep it . I dont know how to help her other than being there. I am so sorry you had to go through this. Let me tell you some things about me. Everyday I think about my baby, Im still google searching what the baby would look like at this gestation age, what the baby would be doing. but something I think people needed to read. Now he blames himself and cries like me everyday. Now, Im regretting every single day of my life. Norma McCorvey, the plaintiff in Roe v. Wade, never had the abortion she was seeking. I cry all the time and I dont think Ill ever stop. Xxx, We are all such incredible and compassionate women. I think about it most days (I would be due on 30th May which coincidentally is my birthday) but I dont dwell on it anymore and do appreciate that for me it just wasnt the right time and I was not ready or prepared to give a child the life it deserves. I am turning 23 in two days, on July 24th funny enough. Im absolutely terrified of both scenarios and have been crocodile tearing constantly. According to Florida's Reducing Fetal and Infant Mortality law, which was implemented last July, abortions are prohibited after 15 weeks of gestation, with a few exceptions, including one that. I have three healthy children 21,17 and 13 from a previous marriage. I just wanted to say thank-you for sharing your story. I have an 11 month old and a 13 year old from my husbands first marriage. So at 26 years old, on April 10th, 2015, just as I had for months prior, I took a pregnancy test because I was eight days late. And soon I'll get my own fingers and toes. I was extremely saddened by the Feb. 18 Buffalo News article concerning the 36 actresses who intended to spend hours reading from "The Handmaid's Tale" to benefit . I'm just a tiny someone, It is simply not a choice anyone wants to make. I sat on the toilet and watched as my destiny-deciding urine diluted with water, coffee, and last nights wine crept across the screen. Have a good day. I need to get a surgical abortion on Monday and he cant even decide if he wants to come and support me. I felt like death every day sometimes unable to stay out longer than 2 hours outside. You will be in my thoughts and in my heart. I feel like its hard to find forums where women arent either all regret or all confidant/fine with their decision. It all means the same thing. I dont want an abortion but that seems to be the best option. I love this man but i dont want a baby now and i feel the worst human being in this world for thinking that way. I need advice from someone, anyone. I was pretty much pressured to become pregnant by my boyfriend at the time (now very ex). We sit in silence for a little while, then I ask him to sit next to me, and he does, all the while looking surprised. Im 29 and each partner Ive been with had children outside of me after we ended our relationship. Keep the faith, you are not alone . They told me to think about what I wanted to do and that theyd support me regardless of my choice. Thank you for this. I dont want you to go through thisit never does go away. Those options may be easier, less expensive, and more in reach than you think. I was accepted into the Montessori teacher training program two days prior. Im grateful I was in a position to have options and make a choice as a woman. I wanted to give her grandchildren but that couldnt be my only reason for keeping the baby. My and my husband have been diagnosed with infertility. Yes, Im still pregnant. Abortion - Pro Life - Letter From an Unborn Child Letter from an unborn child As falling rain is the tears of God for the blood spilled of the unborn children that covers the hands of the human race. I am not in a relationship with the indivdual that I am pregnant with and nor do I want to be as it is a toxic relationship. I dont want to get in trouble I just dont know what to think anymore. I never felt more disconnected to anyone in my life. Im 23 years old. We are both unhappy . I know one day when everything is settled down and fine she/he will come again and Ill be more prepared. He even started pulling out old toys and other items from when his own children were young. Ang, your situation is same as mine. Out loud, we weigh the facts: I have my schooling, Id lose my position of junior teacher if I dont do the teacher training program, thus losing the ability to become a head teacher one day. My heart tells me it wa a girl. I cant make up my mind. I loved you, my first, my only.. Dimplez, The Gift Of Life By I walked back to the preschool where I work with ten minutes to spare and decided, Ill just do it now. I'll be able to hear the sound of your voice. This is your decision and you must do what feels right for you. Ive often wished we met sooner so we could of had a child together. I am 31 and have a 4 year old and an 8 year old step daughter. I long to feel the grass tickle my toes I dont know what to do at all. I paced the bathroom, test in hand, pants still around my ankles, repeating curses to myself like a meditative mantra. Im stressed and feel so alone. The connection happened from day one. Then after that we took a break and he broke up with me on the day I got abortion and said that hes moved to a different state and didnt think he wanted to come back home. Im currently in the exact situation. Making an impassioned plea to her mother to not abort her, she shares her hopes and fears with the woman who can control whether she lives or dies. There was also this paranoia about who the dad was. And draw pictures, made especially for you. I wish I had advice or something magical to say to make everything all betterI dont. I thought the tears would stop but they dont. I dont want to let you go. We chose to end our family after two children. My grief has been unbearable the past 5 days since I had the abortion. Couldnt take my meds or prenatals because the baby threw up everything. And way farther along than I thought. He said he would be there no matter what, but I still didnt want to force a family on him if thats not what he wanted. I dont have the financial capability to take care of a child. I didnt want to be, but I had a hard time standing up to him and saying no for myself. The saline solution burned the baby's skin and poisoned him or her. I know God and His angels will help. The abortionist, he explains, after draining the uterus of the amniotic fluid that was protecting the child, inserts a claw-like instrument into the womb. My daughter knows that Im pregnant and its a very stressful and uncomfortable situation. Im sending love your way, dear one. We wouldnt. Have you done it? Praying for all of you and I know now every situation is so different. Mom's Letter to Baby During Pregnancy A Letter to My Unborn Baby: Here's What I Promise You September 25, 2017 by Laura Marie Meyers Dear Baby, There are still a few months until we. I dont know if you have lived in regret or relief of your abortion before this moment, or what feelings his opinions have risen out of you now- all I know is what you decided to do with your pregnancy, whether that involved him ten years ago or not, was your decision. My eyes fixate on her belly, and I sob. I dont want to let you go. I do wish I wouldve had more support during this time, mainly because my husband shut down due to his circumstances, but it has gone to show me just how strong I am and how much stronger I can be. Oh Mommy please, just give me a chance Im struggling with my decision and I almost wish someone could just make it for me. How do I pick them? I think Ill visit an abortion clinic to avail of a medical abortion service because its difficult for me to survive if I have a child. I know the abortion has made me realise how much of an amazing mum I am going to be but I am also so desperate to be a mummy and the loss in my gut cant be put into words. Me too A M, August the 30th. I hoped the pain and loss in my gut would fade away over time but it hasnt. I made the wrong choice. I am thinking of you xx. I found out I was pregnant exactly two years ago this weekend. We have only been together 8 months though. Tomorrow I take the pills to expel the tissue. But no one talks about it. Only a few days have gone by since I was conceived and I am now growing in your tummy. Hi, Mommy. What makes us experts in Online Poetry Publishing? I know I made the right decision but Im feeling really bad and sad right now. I had an abortion many years ago and I was fine with it because I absolutely knew I was in the right place. Listen to her fears and help her conquer them one by one. Im 28 now and I dont see having a kids in the future maybe because I cant forgive myself with what Ive done. We started trying, but didnt expect it to come so soon. The 20-week ban adds another hurdle. Share your story, thoughts, and prayers in words, pictures, or video. Collection of 38 Abortion Poems That Get You Feel Sad & Guilty Abortion health information An abortion is a procedure to end a pregnancy. If it makes you feel any better, abortion is highly unlikely to affect your future fertility equally though Im missing my baby a lot. And Ill honour them both every minute of every day. I live with my boyfriend hes 39yrs old. I found out I was pregnant today and through the tears, I scheduled the appointment. Its been two years since my abortion and I always think about that little heart beat. I just felt I needed more time to see other heart specialist and doctors to figure out what can be done about my heart before I have another child. And with this tornado in my mind, I wrapped the pee stick (that represented my fate) in toilet paper (which, I couldnt help thinking, was a pretty good metaphor for what was now my life). It was at this point that I started to get really nervous, terrified actually. I am with someone now and he is lovely. Reading this story and the comments gave me some of the comfort I needed. And I was supposedly either unable to conceive or it would be extremely difficult. I would do things so differently. A part of me knows there are logistical & rational reasons why we should not have another & honestly those out number the reasons we should but yet I still want my baby. For My Mommy (the cry of an unborn child) The pain in my gut has not gone away. This poem represents the voice of an unborn child pleading for its life. In pregnancy, to be "late term" means to be past 41 weeks gestation, or past a patient's due date. My heart would of gotten excited despite starting all over again. It's me. You're going to find out about me soon, though, I promise. Our family was complete. I just keep crying. I know it not quite the same but its just how I feel. The abortion debate has been going on for ages. It is a very hard decision to make thinking about having our fist baby but I have no choice. A heart touching letter from a unborn baby to his mother baby is very happy when he is conceived and think that his mother is world's best mom and he share his happiness with his mother telling her all his activities and growing stages in her tummy but his parents decide to abort this baby.. prayatn Follow Advertisement Advertisement Recommended I dont feel like he was there for me as he should. As opposed to most elective . I regret having the abortion because of many things and I ask hem to have another baby even if my situation was the same but he said he didnt want to have a baby he was hart broken every time he see kids he would say my baby wouldve been her or his age and that kills me inside I cry for so many nights and days I still do. I stared and I watched the second line darken and become more prominent. There are different ways to go about this, like: It would have been too early to know the sex for sure but when I think of her I feel her and I know she was my baby girl your not alone, whatever you feel, your not alone. I received my bachelors degree in adolescent counselling just last June. We were told if we wanted children we would have to make a concerned effort. My husband has made this time incredibly difficult for me. God has forgiven you and you should try and forgive yourself. I agree about age being just a number but my husband is 50 and not interested in doing this again. Leet had an abortion at age 15 in the early 1980s. It has only been two years. Gone by The Head and The Heart plays, and I publicly cry at the lyric Gone are the days when the wind would touch my face, gone are the days when youre the wind. All these fears at once can seem unsurmountable, but when you help her chip away at each, she'll begin to feel more confident. I havent gone one day without thinking of it and causing major heartache, especially as family members and friend have now kids. The month before was the most emotionally and physically exhausting of my life. Ive been employed in my feild for the past 4 years (student hires are highly sought in this feild). So many people would love to give that little one a home. At 18 weeks, April and her husband found out that their baby had lethal skeletal dysplasia. I would give anything to hold him. Im not mad at you anymore. Ill be 43 when the child would be born. I moved to another state, finished my undergrad (with a newborn) in teaching and even completed grad school also in teaching (with a toddler at the time). I cant quit my job, but I cant afford 2 in daycare either. I had gone off my birth control a year prior and I didnt get my period for six months; then once I did, they were not predictable: they always came, but my cycle wasnt steady. He now know about it and wants to end our marriage of 4 years. The baby daddy is crying too because we have a lot to achieve in life and this isnt what we expected. So heartbroken. Anyway, Im still mourning and will never forget till the day I die. I didnt touch you, but I felt you. SUBSCRIBE: $1 for 3 months. Shes only known her boyfriend for 3 months and now they are contemplating a forever type of future together to raise this child. Tears and snot are running down my face as I write this, I have 2 beautiful little girls after this and it hasnt got any better. I miss my baby every minute of every day. My boyfriend and I have only been dating a few months. 5 years after that we accidentally get pregnant and have a beautiful baby girl but even after having her I still retreat my choice and he still blaming me as he should I guess but we live a very sad life am trying to have another baby but he is not making as much trying as I do because he say am with you only for my daughter and am living for her to but she always ask for a sister or brother I dont know what to do .so much happened in our life that I think wouldnt be happening if I just have my baby and get married with him . Although I did it for health reasons I am still recovering. I cough and drink more water until it goes down, close to you. A boy or a girl? You can do more than you think you can. It means so much to see it spoken by another. Im 33. He walks into the front room while I am mid-stand, so thats how I greet him. The World Health Organization (WHO) estimates that 42 million abortions are induced worldwide each year. I just broke up with my boyfriend 4 days ago after finding out that he has been cheating on me.Deep down I knew that I was pregnant after 20 days late of my periods and my breasts becoming tender.Today I Decided to take the test and found out that Im Pregnant.I lost my mother a year ago and do not have anyone who will support me and the baby financially.It hurts that Weve always had conversations about having a baby one daday,now that it is happening and Im all alone,I feel like a stupid.termination is the only option but I dont even know What to expect. I am unable to have children, so I will never know what it feels like, but I share your pain through the experiences of others. Even though I knew none of the other ladies who were there for the same reason I felt like I was not going through it alone. If my partner would of came to me and said he wanted to keep this baby I would have and I would of felt more love for him because his courage. This is the worst pain Ive ever felt and the most heartbroken and devastated Ive ever been. I am sitting with this sweet being I cannot support, and feeling so sad. I wasnt ready to quit my job. Me and my boyfriend have our own issues and this time he wanted me to keep this baby but I told him Im not ready to become a mother. Jessa Duggar Seewald, best known for her role on the TLC reality show "19 Kids and Counting," recently shared in a YouTube video that she miscarried what would have been her fifth child. I found out Im 6 weeks pregnant last week. I chose to have an abortion for many reasons, including those I just mentioned. I was pursuing an academic career and never had the chance. You were there, so was my existence. locating a private donor and/ or coparent online All the best xxxx, Hi Owami, your message speaks to me because I was completely alone too. Thank you for sharing. I think when we choose to do something like that we are so confused. Featured Shared Story I loved this poem so much, it made me cry. Hi Melanie, just dont do it! I know I made the right decision, but seeing him with his kids now breaks my heart bc he didnt want the one with me right now. I was 5 weeks pregnant. I told him and he messaged me every day saying to abort it. Ive always had irregular periods and issues. He told me to decide between him and the baby and he would leave. purchasing sperm from a donor, via a cryobank Except I really dont want kids so shell never get the chance to come back to me. Even with his support, the support of my mother, sister, and friends.. Nothing in life is easy but in this case you should try making a list.